Serious question, why do family members always cancel plans like 2 hours before they're supposed to happen

I planned a fishing trip with my cousin last Saturday for two weeks and he texted me at 6am saying he was too tired so I just sat on my porch watching cars go by instead.

3 comments

3 Comments

dianaanderson7d agoMost Upvoted

Ugh @alicehernandez, you nailed it. I have a sister who does this all the time, she'll say she's coming for dinner and then text at 5pm saying she has a headache. It's like they save up the excuse until the very last minute so you can't reschedule or make backup plans. They know if they canceled a week out, you'd have time to find someone else and get mad. But two hours before, you're stuck, your night is shot, and they don't have to deal with your upset face. I'd rather someone just tell me no upfront than leave me waiting around like a fool.

susan_wright345d ago

ngl I used to be the person who thought "better late than never" for cancellations like this. like if someone cancels at the last minute, at least they gave you some notice, right? but reading through this thread and your story about the fishing trip changed my mind hard. waiting around for nothing and having your whole day wasted is way worse than just getting a no upfront. it's so disrespectful of your time and energy, like they think you don't have other stuff to do. honestly seems like people do it to dodge the guilt of letting you down early, but it ends up making you feel even more jerked around.

alicehernandez7d ago

Exactly this. "Too tired" at 6am after two weeks of planning is such a classic move. It feels like people just don't respect the time you set aside for them. I think it comes down to them not wanting to say no upfront because they feel guilty, so they wait until the last second when they know you can't really argue with it. That way they get to cancel without having a real fight about it. But it's way worse than just saying no early because now you're stuck alone with nothing to do. Why do you think they pick such a last minute time to cancel instead of just being honest days before?